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How to stop chasing happiness and start being happy in reality | – Times of India

You are headed in the wrong direction if you start chasing an idea that you believe defines what true happiness is. A lot of what we perceive as happiness is not really that. It’s what social media and our society want you to believe. The happiness paradox states that the more you chase happiness, the less happy you will be, This is because a lot of our energy will be spent trying to analyze and introspect whether we are happy or not, so much so that we stop living in the moment and aim for an “idealized” version of happiness. In this, we miss moments that could have made for memorable moments.

Why do we need to redefine happiness?

In today’s society, people tend to gauge their own happiness by how others perceive them to be happy. Happiness, which was earlier an intangible entity that could only be felt and not quantified, has today become something that can be counted in terms of likes, views, and comments on a social media post. It highlights the role of external perception in influencing personal happiness, the use of propaganda to control this perception Life coach, Dr. Hitu Khera shared with us that “The main issue is that nowadays people evaluate their own Happiness based on how happy others perceive them to be. Hence the need for propaganda”.

Crave for memories not views and likes

The idea that there is a sense of lack or incompleteness is deliberately fostered by market factors. There is an intentional cultivation of a “lack mindset,” where individuals are made to feel like something is missing from their lives, driving them to consume more and participate more actively in the economy. This has forced them to believe they will be happy only if they buy this product or go on that particular vacation.
“Happiness = resources. If we can somehow break this equation, the chase can stop,” Dr. Khera added.
The idea behind this is to question the extent to which material wealth and resources truly contribute to genuine and lasting happiness. It proposes that if we can redefine or expand our understanding of happiness beyond just material possessions and external circumstances, we might be able to alleviate the constant striving for more and achieve a more balanced and contented state of being. This could involve focusing on aspects such as personal relationships, inner well-being, purpose, and experiences that don’t necessarily require the accumulation of resources

Hustle culture—is it really making you happy?

These days, people have become very outcome-focused, equating happiness with the amount of work they are able to complete in a day or the money they can make in a day. They believe the more they exert themselves, the better their chances are of having a comfortable future. The increasing preference for Moonlighting- holding a second job alongside a primary one—is a byproduct of this hustle culture. It is mainly done in pursuit of supplemental income.
The expert thinks otherwise, “I think hustle culture sounds cool and seems productive, but it can be draining mentally and physically”. She adds that this needs to stop somewhere, and “the race stops the moment you stop running. Like a balanced meal is good for the body, a balanced working style is good for life”.

Do things that genuinely give you joy

Do things that genuinely give you joy

How to increase genuine happiness

Here are some tips shared by Dr. Khera on how to prioritise genuine happiness. They focus on improving your mindfulness. They will help you be really present in the moment.
Shift from propaganda to purpose
-Focus on meaningful intentions for the day.
-Set goals to smile more, feel at ease, love your body, and help others.
Embrace the power of gratitude
-Employ the “count your blessings” approach.
-Practice daily gratitude by listing things you’re thankful for.
Invest in experiences
-Prioritize accumulating experiences over material possessions.
-Create memories through adventures, travel, and learning.
Prioritise genuine human interactions
-Foster meaningful connections and conversations.
-Engage in deeper interactions that bring joy and understanding.
Seek happiness intentionally
-Actively search for moments that bring happiness.
-Make happiness a conscious pursuit in daily life.
Shift focus from negativity
-Illustrate the principle of changing focus from black to red.
-Redirect attention from negative aspects to positive ones
Read also: How to stop taking things so personally
Read also: 6 ways to effectively enhance your emotional strength at workplace

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